Killing Monsters 

You’re a noise in my head

I can’t forget 

I toss and turn 

While I’m supposed to be asleep 

You create the monster 

That doesn’t know anything 

You create a mess

That leaves me depressed

Nothing can tie you down 

And I wish I could 

So I could rip you to pieces 

You’re the noise in my head 

Leaving me depressed 

Causing me to think twice 

You create the monster 

That makes the nightmares 

I wish I could hunt you down 

To see you get killed 

Stuck Right Now 

I don’t know what I’m doing with my life 

Don’t know where my passions are leading me 

I’m afraid I’ll fall flat on my face 

And live in dependency 

I just want to be independent 

Have a job that matters to me 

Maybe I could change the world 

Just a little bit 

that would make me happy 

And I want to help others 

Because that’s when I feel alive 

Sharing conversations and memories 

And not just living to survive 

And I want to get by with enough means to

Support my aging parents 

And my siblings who are working hard 

I’m afraid my numbers won’t get me very far 

And that’s a rough start 

Is there even a light? 

At the end of this tunnel?

Sometimes I wonder if I made 

The journey a lot longer 

And harder to get through 

Mental and academic disability 

As self sabotage 

I won’t move far at all 

Always feeling stuck 

Like I am Right Now 

Reminder 

I have to tell myself that 

I love myself

And that means all parts of myself

That means I don’t say that my crying is ugly 

That I say that I hate my hair

That I want to cut my hair 

That I can’t stand how heavy I feel 

That when looks in the mirror and frowns and hopes and wishes 

that the love that I perceive

when I see my reflection is real

That I wish to sleep eternally

That I think that I can’t make anything of myself

That I think that I will never be smart enough 

That I will never have true friends 

That I will always be the outsider 

To kill or maim any part of me

Is like destroying the whole 

For who am I 

Besides the sum of my –broken— parts

Who am I without my scars 

I am just a plain canvas with no story to tell 

No.

I am me 

With all of my hurt and weight 

And thoughts hounding me 

I am me

A work in progress 

finding myself 

learning  about myself 

A person who hopes to aspire to be better 
Every day 

And 

Everyday 

I am 

Me.