I did tasks for you 

That weren’t a part of my job description 

I washed your dirty dishes 

And related your messages 

Once I also gave you water like a waiter

Takes orders from his customers 

Then I was shocked later to realize

That I had let myself become your servant 

Who am I kidding? 

There was no emotional manipulation 

From you and your charming ways 

I did it all with my free will 

And that’s how 

I created my own insanity 

In the midst of your company 

I lost my true identity 

I conformed to some unnamed ideals 

And bowed easily 

I can’t cry and scream

Because I still let myself be 

All the things I hoped not to be

Why did I lose myself 

So easily? 
Did I ever know myself at all?

My free will 

Tells it’s own story 

I’m a people pleaser 

Too emotionally attached 

Too easily 

I thought of everyone as my family 

Without considering any boundaries 

Despite the fact we were all strangers 

I wanted others not by blood around me 

So I compromised and let myself have this

 community like it was a special commodity

But, I actually thought it was 

I had myself had 

Because there were problems aplenty 

Miscommunication and mistrust 

Bandwagons of people who 

Left others in the dust

Riding off in the hope of a sunrise

That I’m not too sure will ever come 

In the midst of all the dust 

I’m left standing wondering 

Did I ever know myself at all? 


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